Suge White’s Getting Soft

vikingSuge White used to be an angry man.  I’m not sure what happened.  Lately, I’ve been engaging in friendly conversations, agreeing with strangers, and keeping my worst thoughts to myself more then ever before.  I think I’m getting soft.  I used to not care what anyone else thought… check that, I still don’t care what anyone else thinks but at least now I’m pretending I do.  I am also doing the right thing more so then ever.  I’ve actually started holding the door for others.  Another improvement is no longer attempting to make other people’s children cry, that’s a big step forward for me.  When I’m driving my car, I actually stop at cross walks and politely wave old women across… however, I will rev the engine as they cross the road to let them know that I’m still there.  I’ve also started to receive invitations to other peoples gatherings. I went to a Big Zach’s (Local Goon) wedding this past weekend and I actually wore a suit.  Old Suge would have just worn a diaper and a pair of fluorescent aqua socks.  I finally realized that doing such things would just not be acceptable.  What has changed?  Why do I now care?  I think all the THC that I used to pump into my system has finally wore off.  I no longer sit around thinking of things to hate.  Don’t get me wrong, I still possess hatred for things, and people, that most others would never dream of hating… like gargoyles, the word extemporaneous, the predeceased Dom Deluise (even I won’t hate on the dead),  and large bags of Cheetos (O.K., I lied.  I love Cheetos).  However, my hatred is more controlled now, that’s all.

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One Response to “Suge White’s Getting Soft”

  1. cheetos are bomb bee and be ez

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