Invasive Species

asian_longhorned_beetle_2Well, it looks like my hometown is officially infested with the Asian Longhorned Beetle.  We need to do something about this one.  Besides looking to eradicate the species, we should be looking for revenge against the Chinese.  This is very clearly, to me, an attack.  What can I say?  They sell us a product but they include, without our knowledge, a little beetle that is going to devastate our lumber industry.  It’s like some girl blowing you in the dark, only for you to find out later she has herpes all over her mouth.  Sure you got the BJ but you also got something else and didn’t even know it… and that something else ruined a perfectly good hummer.  On the bright side, it’s not going to kill you… but it will stop you from putting your wood certain places, just like the beetle.  The bottom line is, we either keep our infected wood to ourselves or we turn around and use it to infect someone elses wood… No Homo. I think we should give it to Canada in retaliation for giving us The Bare Naked Ladies and Keanu Reeves.  I also wonder if Mexico would take any of our wood.  We could get them back for giving us that swine flu.

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