News Sucks

I love watching the news, if only to give me something to hate.  Here it is:

The Craigslist Killer–  Fucking phenominal.  Listen… to be a killer, you need to kill more than one person.  You also need to intend on killing someone ahead of time, not just during a time of panic.  Plan on the killing.  I don’t consider the Craiglist Killer a ‘killer’.  Yes, he killed someone but he is no Dahmer or Gacy.  They were killers and damn good at it.  As sick and twisted as they were, at least they had a plan

Torture–  I thought we agreed that waterboarding was torture.  Why is it now being described as a tough interrogation tactic?  Just because we released memos and shit doesn’t change what happened.  Also, FOX News needs to stop claiming that admitting we did this is so dangerous.  Everybody already knew we did this stuff, it’s not news.  It WAS news… 2 fucking years ago.  Knock that shit off.  We should start torturing people who are making such a big deal out of this.  

Pirates–  We should also start torturing pirates.  Maybe that would get them to knock that shit off.  The news outlets need to get behind this like they get behind other social issues.  Or we could be Canadians and just let them go.  They say they have no legal standard to hold pirates.  We didn’t have any legal standard to waterboard terrorists, we just did it.    Fucking Pussies.  Maybe we should start waterboarding Canadians to get them to stick up for themselves.

Dick Cheney–  This one is simple.  STOP INTERVIEWING HIM!  He had 8 years to talk and he chose not to say a fucking thing.  Why let him talk now?  He never wanted to explain the shit they were doing then.  When he did have to explain stuff he just lied.  I hope they torture him too.    He should be forced into a gay marriage and required to earn his money by disgarding fetuses at an abortion clinic.  I also hope that someday he is so disabled that he has to rely on his lesbian daughter, and her partner, to take care of him.  They can change his diaper and then feed him without washing their hands.

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